The Best Rude Garden Gnomes, Naughty Gnomes and Naked Gnome

We have searched high and low to bring you the:

  • best rude garden gnomes,
  • best naughty gnomes
  • best inappropriate garden gnomes
  • best naked gnome for your garden

Getting a bit bored of the simple, and traditional, garden gnome? Spruce up the garden with rude, naughty, naked and inappropriate novelty gnome!

These Gnomes will definitely be a talking point when friends and family come round and see them, how that conversation go’s is up to you.

Some of these could be considered as naughty garden gnomes and others can be considered as inappropriate garden gnomes.

We don’t mince our words with this review, so please be aware that strong and sensitive language is used.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you!!!

Welcome Butt Naught Gnome

welcome garden gnome

It is interesting to note that this little guy can kiss his own butt goodbye, he is that flexible! You may consider letting him receive your guests with a heartfelt welcome. He will do his best to bring a smile to the faces of your guests.

There is also a lovely line of symmetry to this gnome. It is handmade with natural, eco-friendly materials, and he is a very beautiful piece. There are no sharp edges to worry about and he is a perfect gnome for any occasion.

This would make him suitable to be used indoors as well as outdoors. Keeping him in the garden for guests to greet or perhaps in the conservatory or porch is a great idea.

Additionally, his hand painted appearance is protected by a UV-resistant coating that should keep him out of harm’s way all year round.

He measures approximately 15cm tall, and would make a great gift for anyone who loves gardens or gnomes.


Welcome Butt Naught Gnome

Go away gnome plaque

Whether you have a garden or not, you can be rude to guests and passersby with this charming garden gnome wall plaque!

His window is open and he is flipping the finger at anyone who passes by.

While extending his middle finger, he frowns harshly out and has a bushy white beard. He wears a red cap and blue jacket. It’s clear what he’s saying.

There’s even an aggressive look to his pet squirrel!

His window sill displays large text reading “Go Away.”.

Polyresin and fibreglass hardened together form this unusual gnome wall plaque. A coating protects him from the elements after he was painted and polished by hand.

Dimensions are 9″ high x 7″ wide x 2.5″ deep. There is only one screw needed to hang this piece of artwork, and it isn’t very heavy. If you know someone who loves gnomes, or if you just don’t like people, this could make the perfect gift.


Jurassic Gnome The Garden Gnome Massacre

dinosaur eating garden gnome

Watch out everyone this is Jurassic Gnome and the dinosaurs have escaped their enclosures and are running wild around your garden.

This dinosaur has captured 4 garden gnomes and is eating one of them, stepping on another and is holding one in each arm. Once he’s finished with them, who’s next.

This funny garden gnome is cast with weather resistant polyresin and measures around 24cm in height.

This funny gnome also makes for a great household ornament. We just love this novelty gnome.


Jurassic Gnome The Garden Gnome Massacre

dinosaur eating garden gnome

Watch out everyone this is Jurassic Gnome and the dinosaurs have escaped their enclosures and are running wild around your garden.

This dinosaur has captured 4 garden gnomes and is eating one of them, stepping on another and is holding one in each arm. Once he’s finished with them, who’s next.

This funny garden gnome is cast with weather resistant polyresin and measures around 24cm in height.

This funny gnome also makes for a great household ornament. We just love this novelty gnome.


Cheeky Mooning Naughty Gnome

Mooning Garden Gnome

Standing at 18cm tall this traditional dressed garden gnome with his pointy red hat and long white beard is a very cheeky old chap, but is he mooning or about to pull his trousers down to have a poo in your prized flower bed, that’s for you to decide.

This naughty gnome is made from weather resistant polyresin.


Loonie Moonie Bare Buttocks

Bare Bottom Garden Gnome
Loonie-Moonie-Garden-Gnome

Why not greet all guests and visitors with this very unusual gnome welcome. As his beard touches the ground, his butt reaches for the sky.

Wearing bright red makes him unmissable, whilst his innocent smile disguises his true wickedness, as his pink buttocks are displayed for all to see. His massive feet keep him steady and a blue bird happily pecks his bum. 

Measuring at 19cm x 15cm x 20.5cm, this great garden gnome sculpture is hand casted with real crushed stone and lovingly hand-painted one piece at a time. Loonie Moonie is also weather resistant. 

This mooning gnome, is without a doubt an ideal rude garden gnome gag gift.


a rude garden gnome

At first glance this gnome may look like a traditional garden gnome with his red hat and white beard, but when you take a closer look you will see that he is a very rude garden gnome.

His face shows pure anger and rage with his teeth gritted. He is also giving you the finger, his middle finger firmly raised telling you to “F**k Off” basically. This swearing gnome is standing next to a sign which clearly reads go away.

Made from weatherproof polyresin and standing at 24cm tall.

This rude garden gnome gives that subtle touch of silent rudeness. So, by all means point him at any neighbours you don’t like, I’m joking of course feel free to place him anywhere you like.


a drunk garden gnome

Whilst this naughty garden gnome might have started the night with the intention of only having 1 drink, he clearly went above and beyond that, he even managed to loose one of his shoes in the process. Must of been one hell of a night for this garden gnome statue.

He’s posed half lying on the floor and half resting on a log, with one hand holding an empty wine glass and the other hand holding his head.

Made from weatherproof polyresin and standing at over 20cm tall.

Place him amongst other naughty gnomes to complete the mix of garden gnome statues.


Naked Gnome Couple

a naked garden gnome couple

This nude gnome couple want to rock out the sun in their birthday suits and don’t care about what others think.

The male naked gnome stands proud, exposing his man bits complimented with some shades to make him look even more naughty.

The female gnome is topless, wearing pink bikini bottoms and love-heart sunglasses for that extra bit of love.

Drinks in hand, they are clearly enjoying themselves.

Both of these naughty naked small gnomes are 11cm high and are made from weather resistant polyresin and lovingly hand painted. 

These novelty naked gnomes will make a unique statement in your garden or where you see best fits for them to be placed.


Pot Smoking Garden Gnome

pot smoking gnome

This free love, naughty naked garden gnome is enjoying a smoke of home-grown pot.

His vibe is very hippie with his blue swirled tie-die pointed hat. He may be naughty, but the irresistible smile on his pink gnome face makes you want to love him even more!

He is possed semi naked with both arms up in the are and wearing a small waistcoat and a tiny thong.

This naughty garden gnome will definitely be an eye opener in your garden measuring at 10.8 x 10.8 x 26.7cm and is made out of weather resistant resin.


Red Rum Gnome

This REDRUM naughty and evil garden gnome makes you want to sleep with one eye open. (REDRUM spells the word “Murder” backwards if you were not aware).

If you are fan of the 1980’s “The Shining” horror film this scary gnome will make a great addition to your garden. It’s a take on the iconic phrase “Here’s Johnny!”.

This gnome will make sure that any visitors  take extra care in your garden as they are well aware of what consequences will be if they don’t.

Some might say he more dangerous than naughty, but to be dangerous you also have to be a bit naughty.

He measures at 16.5 x 15.2 x 24.1cm and is made from a weather resistant polyresin.


a garden gnome with a very large penis

If your looking for a rude garden gnome or even a naughty garden gnome, then this is the one for you.

This rude gnome has a super sized penis, it’s so big that he has to carry it around in a wheelbarrow.

He’s not shy about it and is more than happy to flaunt it about, traditional in style with his red hat and white beard, green jacket and brown trousers.

You’ll be glad to hear that he also comes with a log cover that will cover his enormous willy on those cold, frosty days.

Made of weatherproof unbreakable PVC, he has 2 layers of varnish, last thing he wants is to get sunburnt on his penis, and he’s made in Germany.

Have you got the balls to buy and display him?


a garden gnome having a poo and holding his nose

This cheeky gnome has just had a poo on your lovely flowerbed, it must of been quite stinky as he is seen holding his nose and his red trousers around his ankles. 

A rather rude garden gnome, but hey, I guess when you have to go, you just gotta go.

He’s true to tradition with his pointed hat and long white beard. Some may say that this inappropriate gnome is mooning, however we all know the truth.

Casted with polyresin mixed with crushed stone, and is fully weatherproof.

This is definitely a cheeky naughty garden gnome.

He measures at 14 x 12.5 x 24cm.


garden gnome holding toilet paper
a rude garden gnome just had a poo

Well now this is one very rude and inappropriate garden gnome for having a poo in the garden, couldn’t he have just waited until the toilet was free? With toilet paper in hand

This naughty garden gnome stands at approx. 32cm. He is made in Germany from unbreakable PVC and has two layers of varnish for protection against sunlight.

He will surely but a grin on all visitors faces.


garden gnome in boxer shorts

This sexy naughty garden gnome is just oozing sexiness.

He’s lying on his prize hare rug wearing just his traditional red hat, blue boxer shorts with red and with mushrooms printed on them and his black boots.

Made from weather resistant polyresin and around 17cm tall.

This naughty garden gnome looks good indoors or outdoors.


naked gnome with red flip flops, sunglasses and blue hat holding a can of beer

This butt naked gnome will surely grab anyone’s attention, as he lies on the floor with a big smile, without a care in the world. He’s a total exhibitionist and not embarrassed in the slightest.

We see him wearing red flip-flops, blue hat and sunglasses whilst holding a can of beer in his hand. 

This naked gnome measures 24cm long and is made from durable weatherproof polyresin.


a naked gnome mowing the lawn

There is nothing quite like doing a bit of gardening naked, and this naked gnome proves it. Smiling away, mowing the lawn with only his red hat and black boots.

This rude garden gnome will definitely be a talking point in anyone’s garden. He’s is the best way to get your lawn in tip top shape. He’s equipped with a large blade and a sassy attitude to mowing.

Made from weatherproof polyresin.

Dimensions – 14.00 x 8.80 x 18.80 cm (LxWxH)


a garden naked gnome who likes his drink
a naked gnome who like to drink seen from behind

This naked gnome is a must for anyone with a home bar or a beer garden. He loves his drink and wouldn’t be out of place at Oktoberfest, wanting to raise a toast and sample the newest brew.

Wearing a green hat and matching pointy green shoes. Holding a full glass of beer in one hand and an empty glass in the other. His manhood is covered by a bottle cap.

This gnome is a party animal. He’ll drink to that!

Made from weatherproof polyresin.

Dimensions – 12.7 x 12.7 x 34.29 cm and weighs just under 1kg



You could say the order of the day when it comes to garden gnomes is “go big or go home.” Little people with big personalities, these statues and figurines take gardening to a whole new level, and allow gardeners to express themselves in ways they never could have dreamed of before. When you want to make sure your garden is as unique as you are, there is no better way than to add a set of rude garden gnomes and naughty garden gnomes.